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The Bunk Bed 30 Jul 2013 | 07:37 am
My mom is the kind of person who will put your cup in the dishwasher if you set it down for even a second. I think my childhood catchphrase was, "Hey, I wasn't finished!" And the woman never met a yar...
Actually Watching TV is the New "I Only Watch Documentaries on PBS" 23 Jul 2013 | 08:41 am
I'd like to depart from my normal topics of parenting, writing and, well, me, and talk about something very near and dear to my heart: television. I live in Los Angeles, a place where though many, ma...
Four Things I’ve Learned Now That I'm Four (And a Half) Years Into Being a Mom 16 Jul 2013 | 07:38 am
1. Toddlers don’t give a crap about arboretums They're humoring me, the sweethearts. There’s something about seeing my kids gambol about in a proper English garden that makes me feel like I might no...
The Textual Equivalent of a Selfie 9 Jul 2013 | 07:59 am
Usually when there are selfies on my phone it's because I took a picture of my face to text to my twenty-year-old cousin/spirit animal Timmy to make a particular point, but he's off being a camp couns...
All The Things 2 Jul 2013 | 02:14 am
I went to the mall because I'm uncreative that way. It's the only way I could think of to demarcate today as the first day of a new era: the era in which I am able to go to the mall alone. The school ...
It's Tough To Get a Pic of Her Mouth Closed 24 Jun 2013 | 09:38 pm
Bea talks constantly. "But, JJ," you're probably thinking, "surely you exaggerate." Alas, I am not. I swear to glob that I don't know when she has time to inhale. She must use some kind of circular br...
I Dream of Counter Space. 18 Jun 2013 | 08:54 am
Our cute little shoebox yard You know that moment when you open your car door to step out and you see a used condom on the ground and you're like, welp, I guess I ought to let the kids out on the oth...
I Dream of Counter Space. 18 Jun 2013 | 08:54 am
Our cute little shoebox yard You know that moment when you open your car door to step out and you see a used condom on the ground and you're like, welp, I guess I ought to let the kids out on the oth...
Alohamahalomelekalikimakaaloha 11 Jun 2013 | 07:42 am
The only excursion during our 8-day trip to Honolulu that was — in hindsight — a bad idea was Moana Falls. It may seem like a dick move to talk about a vacation in terms of the one thing that didn't w...
Alohamahalomelekalikimakaaloha 11 Jun 2013 | 05:08 am
The only excursion during our 8-day trip to Honolulu that was — in hindsight — a bad idea was Moana Falls. It may seem like a dick move to talk about a vacation in terms of the one thing that didn't w...